When you hear the word success, what are the things that come to mind?
Perhaps you associate success with money, the job title you have, the degree you have earned, or how far you have been able to climb the corporate ladder. You may also think of someone famous or with a certain social status.
While it may be tempting to define success by these circumstances, we must also be careful not to fall into the idea of success but instead focus on what it truly means to ourselves.
This mirage of success outlined by fame and money can create a false image rather than chasing the truth of what it means to us. At some point, you may even realize that chasing the concept of success isn’t everything it’s cracked up to be.
Scoring the corner office or achieving another job promotion may sound exciting, but it may not be valuable if it isn’t what you truly want.
When the question, “What is success?” is asked, the correct answer is — there is no right answer. There isn’t one response that we can all equally get behind because success is how we define it individually.
To be clear, I am all for titles, money, and climbing the corporate ladder, but only if those things are part of your definition of success.
One of the most important things you can do for yourself and your well-being is to return to your definition of success and do it often.
American businesswoman Anne Sweeney once said, “Define success on your own terms, achieve it by your own rules, and build a life you are proud to live.” Perhaps that is what each of us needs to hear. We have permission to decide what living a successful life is.
Here are three helpful tips to remember as you build your definition.
1. Be Mindful Of Your Connection Between Money And Success
If you are thinking about creating your definition based on how many digits you can acquire in your bank account, you may want to think again.
Society has a way of placing pressure on us to be consumed with the idea of chasing money. We may even consider that more money automatically means we will be happier, but that isn’t always the case. There are many other important factors we need to think about. Here is what one of the wealthiest, Bill Gates, has to say. Gates defines success by making a difference and caring for the people closest to him. He once said, “It is also nice to feel like you made a difference — inventing something or raising kids or helping people in need.”
Instead of being all encompassed with chasing money, make sure you also pause from time to time to ensure you pursue morals, values, and a meaningful purpose, not just a bigger paycheck.
2. The Validity Of Feeling Successful Comes From Within Yourself
If you’re looking for validation in this world for how you define success, you may just be waiting awhile. Not everyone’s opinions of success are going to align with your definition.
As an exercise, it is good to ask others their definition to gain perspective. However, If you let other people define your definition of success, you risk chasing the idea of being successful rather than pursuing what it means to you.
For that reason, your definition is going to come from inside yourself. Think back to a time in your life, to an accomplishment you felt the proudest. What was significant about that accomplishment?
Did you change someone’s life?
Face a fear?
Use that moment as the foundation of how you measure your success.
3. Don’t Let Materialism Define Your Success
If success is defined by materialistic purchases, fancy cars, and a big home, be mindful that it may not be all it’s cracked up to be.
Back in college, I coveted Tiffany’s jewelry. I grew up in a family with financial difficulties and thought I would feel like I “made it” once I could afford something out of reach. I had this vision that once I could strut myself right into the store on Fifth Avenue, it would make me feel like a different person.
As it turns out, once I did own a Tiffany’s necklace, it made me feel no different in the long run. The feeling I was looking for was already inside me. I needed to look deeper to understand what success meant to me.
Many of us may not realize that success can also be a moving target. Our careers and other factors outside ourselves may pivot as our lives change. We may start a family, and our definition may evolve—and that’s okay.
Final Thoughts
Take some time and reflect on who you are as a person, and consider how you spend your time.
Does who you are and what you do align with your definition of success?
If not, it may be time to put pen to paper and create a new definition of what success means to you.
Remember, there isn’t one set definition of success to abide by.
Success is what makes you happy; it has nothing to do with anyone else.
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